The last couple of week have had one challenge after another.I know these thing make us stronger but also have to wonder if is only if they don’t kill us first. Let me explain….Taking care of my 95 year old parents is a feat only for the strong and I sometimes wonder where I fit in.They don’t live with me but are just down the road so I am on 24/7 call. I’m there daily to take in the mail,empty potty seats, trash cans and general clean up from what ever hits the floor. It isn’t hard work just emotionally draining. In the last two weeks both have fallen. First it was my Dad. Sometimes he manages to get back up himself but sometimes we have to call the EMT’s for help. He gets very upset when he can’t manage on his own and can get kinda ugly.
Then …the very next day Gardian,he security company, call because Mother had pushed the button and wasn’t answering the phone. She had fallen in the bathroom and hit her head so we spent the afternoon in the ER making sure she didn’t have any fractures. Thankfully she didn’t but we won’t be taking any pictures for their anniversary coming up. There was big goose egg on her forehead and eventually her face was black and blue which then turned yellow. Not picture taking flattery. They will have been married 74 years on May 1.
Next… …we got disapointing news on the newest granddaughter. This will be an on going thing and prayers would be greatly appreciated.
Then…with my Dad’s situation we have had to do some things he doesn’t like or understand .Sometimes things go smooth, sometime not. This was one of the nots. I had to call in help and hopefully he will get over it and calm down. If not..well there just aren’t many options. Prayers needed here too.
We did win ball games during all of this. I missed one of the girls softball games but I’m not out there playing so probably didn’t make much difference.
In the mean time the garden is growing. Outside and in the craft room.
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Comments on: "Change Please !" (14)
God love you Beverly, hang in there, sounds like one of those one day at a time, times. Keeping you and yours in my prayers. Grace and blessings!
Thanks Bruce.
Been there and done that, it’s so sad seeing one parents getting so frail. Both my parents passed two years ago within 6 weeks of each other and it was a merciful release all round. There are other examples though – my dad’s twin sister will be 92 in August and still teaches yoga! Your garden looks beautiful – smell the flowers and breathe.
I will be praying for you Beverly. My in-laws are now in assisted living as Mom kept falling and would not go in for her gall-bladder issues. She ended up with 2 major surgeries less than 24 hours apart. Had she gone in 4 years ago they might still be in their home. Dad is nearly 90 and is forgetful so we are thankful for the beautiful assisted living facility in their hometown. They were not excited about it first but have come to realize it is a wonderful place to be. I will keep you in my prayers…..it is not an easy road.
Thank you Chicken, I wish we had that option but sadly we don’t. I’m not sure what is going to happen here but something will have to give eventually. Crying UNCLE doesn’t help.
Oh dear! What a time you have had! I will pray for you and your family. How nice that you still found time to make something beautiful in the midst of the chaos! You are so dear to me, and neve cease to inspire me.
Right back at you. Love you and yours.. xoxo
Thank you dear Rabbit. Years ago a very good friend and our young preacher at the time who had a young daughter who was always “so very tired”. I’m with Lucy,,,I am so very tired. LOL
Dearest Beverly,
I’m so sorry that I’m late getting here to your blog, and missed this post.
I know the pain of having a parent (or in your case two) who’s needs are great, and know how worrying, draining, on the spirit, the heart and the body, and how difficult it is trying to reason with them when you’re trying to do the very best for them and make the decisions which you know they will take issue with.
Not sure if it’s pride or stubbornness which makes them take a stand against anything which you see as helpful – but you are not alone. My mother was exactly the same.
Know that you are doing a wonderful ‘job’.
You are caring for them and making the decisions because the decisions you are making are the ones they don’t want to make, for fear of loosing their right ‘to be’.
I am filled with admiration for you and of you. You, as you rightly say, are on duty 24/7, and have your own set of unique problems which in themselves wear you down and leave you feeling less than wonderful. Add to those, the problems that your parents experience, which then become your problems … well, that’s enough to try the patience of an angel with nothing on their mind!
You’re doing great Bev. You’re a truly wonderful Grammy, a loving and caring mother, and a devoted daughter. You are a lot of different things to a lot of different people, and then just to add the cherry on top of the cake … you’re also my friend. That last one by itself could cause a headache to a saint, and yet … you’re still standing and you’re still my wonderful, loving, caring, fabulous friend who I love very much.
Cut yourself some slack. You’re doing A LOT! You perhaps need to let some things slide past you and give yourself a bit of breathing time. Maybe not babysit quite so much. Not cook big family meals so often. And …. ask for more help from the younger members of your family. You’re looking after your parents. They need to look after theirs. YOU.
It’s time for them to maybe help out a little with looking after your mum and dad. Their grandparents. Even if it’s only taking them for some of their medical appointments. Even a little thing like that would make a whole big difference to you.
Praying for you, your parents, … for you all – including Babe.
Sending you my love, as always. ~ Cobs. xxx
My sweet sweet Cob. What would blog land do without your encouragement.I do hope you understand that some of us would be lost without your pushing us on. That’ is why we got so concerned when you went missing with all your craft stuff. ( Are you settled yet? We want to see ) Have no fear…I’m a tough ole bird but I will email you the unbelievable real story. My angel cousins from Texas are coming for lunch tomorrow. Now you know I’m not into cooking lately so keeping things pretty simple and so glad they aren’t here to stay.I am still “so very tired”. LOL
Wow somehow I missed this post while I was away overseas and never caught up with your blog. This certainly fill me in with more details for your prayer requests which I have prayed for.
Thank you again. I just never know what the day may hold. But ….Our God is good …I just hope He keeps me together .
Amen
being a caregiver is very tough, yes
thanks for sharing your story
will write mine someday soon